Halloween in France

They don’t do Halloween in France.

It is vaguely acknowledged that it is a holiday, but more in the sense that it is the day before Toussaints (All Saint’s Day), which is TOTALLY celebrated, as a sort of remembrance day. I rode my bike past the cemetery yesterday and they were unloading a flatbed truck of chrysanthemums, which are the traditional flower in France for funerals and the dead. It’s a national holiday, and people visit the graves of their family; and chrysanthemums are THE flower for this. They’re really associated with death.

Meaning: don’t give one as a gift for ANY OTHER reason. It’s kind of hugely offensive. 😉 (You know, “Say it with flowers”? GIving a chrysanthemum is the equivalent of saying “Drop dead”.)

Want to know how to actually say ” Drop dead” in French? Try: Fous le camps et morte. It’s actually really rude, so on second thought – don’t. 😉 I had to look up a page of French insults to find that out, so I now know a lot more useful phrases. Baby steps, people!

Incidentally, my favorite insult on this page is; “Vous êtes une pomme de terre avec le visage d’un cochon d’inde” – You are a potato with the face of a guinea pig.

Meanwhile: back in Halloween-land. Which I’m not, but wanting to celebrate anyway. 🙂 Unfortunately, I have a feeling that if I dress in costume and start knocking on people’s doors in the village, I’m going to get arrested. So, we’ll have to think of something else.

Noooo! Not that either. I did try to find a pumpkin (found some, but more the “I’m-Really-A-Squash” variety, not the “I-Have Smooth-Skin-and-Am-the-Right-Size-For-Stabbing” variety. ) They don’t have candy corn, or creepy novelty candy. There isn’t glitter facepaint or temporary hair dye by the checkout counter, or fake cobwebs decorating people’s front porches. It’s such a THING in the U.S that I’m kind of sad that I don’t get to do it really this year.

Instead, I’m thinking I’m going to download some creepy movies, light a fire, and roast pumpkin seeds. (I mean, the pumpkins they had in the store are FINE for that, and I can make soup with the rest. Pumpkin soup and roasted seeds and good toasted bread and maybe something with apples? For dessert?)

Also now that I know, next year I am totally stocking up. Bags of candy corn and masks from the U.S and Indian corn and whatever I can think of. Costumes. They do a thing at the French American Center here, a little soirée for Halloween (It really is an American holiday these days) but it’s for kids…so next year maybe I can participate? With the little shrimp-who-will-no-longer-be-a-shrimp-but-a-real-person? Kind of a nice idea. 🙂

Anyway: Happy Halloween everyone!! In honor of the holiday, here are the absolute WORST bits of dialogue from the Ed Wood classic, Plan 9 From Outer Space. And then the chainsaw-arm scene, from Evil Dead 2. Just…you know. Because.


One thought on “Halloween in France

  1. In scotland, until very recently we never got big carving pumpkins, so people carved turnips. Yes, turnips. It’s nearly impossible. Can you imagine a child trying to hollow out a turnip? An accident waiting to happen. And when you light a candle inside it STINKS. Waaaay worse than burning pumpkin. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s